Things That Should Die With This Gen - The Bear and Badger

adored

Olimite wrote:

Perks. Don't make the better players even more powerful, for the love of god!

I want backwards perks. Every time you reach a certain level you lose another skill - if you're good enough to reach level 60/whatever you should take pride in Bing able to take down overpowered noobs.

AJ

Probably the mostly artificial hard distinction between "core" and "casual" players. There's got to be a hell of an overlap.

Webbins

Client side hit detection on a dedicated server hosted game - also known as Battlefield 3. Niche I'll grant you, however, the mentality of hosting multiplayer on servers and then employing an P2P mechanic of calculating bullets to hit points is bizarre. It only stretches the netcode to breaking point and allows those that can manipulate it extra gain. Lump non-region locked servers into this too, far too many saddo Americans exploit this flaw to buff their k/d, knowing they enjoy a latency advantage the majority of the time.

adkm1979

Countdown Timers
I've been banging this drum since they ruined Smuggler's Run with them. Unless it's absolutely necessary for a critical plot point, they can fuck off. Let me play different ways. If I want to take a get-there-as-fast-as-you-can approach, I will, but if I'd rather not, don't force my hand.

Complicated/Obfuscated Save Systems
Hello GTAV with your bed saves, quick saves and auto saves which might all be doing the same thing but make me really unsure what you're doing, if or how you're doing it. Plenty of games also hide the time of saves, so you're not sure which one to load. FIFA does well by running multiple auto-saves, and making it crystal clear when each save was made. No reason for anyone else to do anything different.

QTEs
Like moonwalking, most people who think they can do it well really can't, and people who know they can't want to show everyone their best attempt anyway.

Moonwalking
Naughty Dog dished out a lesson on how to deal with playable characters near walls, only for folk to take the piss. I'd rather my character laid a hand on every wall as though it was there than had their knee disappear into it like a successful Men Who Stare at Goats experiment, as they walk on the spot and spin on an invisible y axis through their head.

Gamerscore/Trophies
By all means set some interesting alternative challenges, but don't award them nonsensical 'values'. Achievements can stay, trophies can stay if they're stripped of their previous metal grading.

adkm1979

afgavinstan wrote:

Okay, maybe I hated myself more buying X-Blade. I'm kidding, Andy! I've never bought it.

Heh! You know, I meant to mention X-Blades in the GotG thread earlier, and then forgot as I set off on another tangent. I'll forgive you IF you promise to find a copy and play it.

LazyGunn

I'll second final fantasy, and whoever designs the characters should genuinely be put to death, they're a debased and loathesome creature who must be exterminated

Paul the sparky

FTL is the perfect example of a Roguelike isn't it? If you die it's game over, everything you encounter on your way to the boss is random. Great game, I might have to explore more games in that vein.

An end to loading times would be great, but lol at fucking adored, GTAV has like one loading screen in the whole game.

Preorder bonuses can fuck off. Why should I miss out on some shit because I bought the game at x instead of y?

Fucking laaaaaaaag in online games. Seriously, fuck it. Ruins everything the game is trying to achieve if some laggy prick is killing you from another dimension. Special mention to Far Cry 3, Webbo was literally invisible in one game we played, I couldn't hit him even though he kindly put himself in front of my weapon, and when he killed me apparently I committed suicide as my game didn't recognise the fact that he was in the game. Online gaming doesn't get any worse than that.

tigersgogrrr

FTL sounds very much like a Roguelike.

I'm going to try playing it now. For the first time. I bet I win.

AJ

Paul the sparky wrote:

An end to loading times would be great, but lol at fucking adored, GTAV has like one loading screen in the whole game.

There's stuff that doesn't look like loading screens, but is. Like that things where it zooms out and in when you switch character.

Sasukekun

Pause menus that take time to load

Made up buzzwords in press releases

Paul the sparky

tigerswiftly wrote:

FTL sounds very much like a Roguelike.

I'm going to try playing it now. For the first time. I bet I win.

You won't get past sector five, but you'll still be winning.

Paul the sparky

AJ wrote:

Paul the sparky wrote:

An end to loading times would be great, but lol at fucking adored, GTAV has like one loading screen in the whole game.

There's stuff that doesn't look like loading screens, but is. Like that things where it zooms out and in when you switch character.

And the forced slow walk before engaging a mission. They're still a good alternative to loading screens.

AJ

I see them as a different way of presenting them, rather than an alternative to. Like those zooming circle to black things Nintendo used to do.

On the whole, they are better, though.

beano

Other things that can get to fuck.

Edge 10's. Worthless now, something to do with this generation and rewriting the past, this generation.

Language Prompts. EVERYTIME I START THE FUCKING GAME WHEN I ALREADY HAVE A SAVE. FUCK ORRRRRF.

Nintendo. You exist to get impaired or judgemental people into gaming for me though, fuck nintendo. Fuck them all.

Consoles. Why are we still here?

Exclusives. Again, why are we still here?

The Future. In every studio motherfuckers have cross compatibility. Ichi from localisation is playing Game X on Platform A while Ni is playing Game X on platform 1 and they're in the same multiplayer environment. SHOW ME FUCKING CONVERGENCE YESTERDAY.

In other news, I've spunked nutmeg on top of a lasagna. I'm merging Moussaka with Lasagne. There's no bech' but there's cream. I've Lassaka. Converge that.

beano

Rougelikes and Indies can stay off your list though, Gav. So can kickstarter.

I mean to say, you'd use if you wanted.

LazyGunn

Yeah i didn't dig the Kickstarter hate, for all the snake oil and the crashed and burned, the worlds a better place for it being there

LazyGunn

Actually it would be remiss of me not to spice things up with some evangelism given the Kickstarter defending

Monitors - Get an Oculus Rift, make everyone make their games work with it, look at your monitor forevermore as a horrible relic of stunted senses

beano

Fuck real life.

YOLO.

LazyGunn

beano wrote:

Fuck real life. YOLO.

I dunno if you're double or triple or god knows what kind of bluff that was

LazyGunn

I kinda want you to be being sarcastic and patronising me just so i can get on my soapbox

AJ

beano wrote:

In every studio motherfuckers have cross compatibility. Ichi from localisation is playing Game X on Platform A while Ni is playing Game X on platform 1 and they're in the same multiplayer environment. SHOW ME FUCKING CONVERGENCE YESTERDAY.

I've been thinking that for ages, even have a rough plan to launch something for it. Unfortunately, other stuff and me being lazy gets in the way of knocking together a prototype and taking to Kickstarter.

Also, Nintendo need to stay for the core 3D Mario platformers. Though I'd be absolutely fine if that's all they did.

Curtis

Peter Molyneux

Paul the sparky

Curtis wrote:

Peter Molyneux

Ha, maybe not the man himself, but his false promises can go.

Chief

I want "running away simulators" to die. Sick of the cheap horror games that aren't intelligent enough to find a real way to scare gamers, instead relying on removing all defence and using cheap mechanics.
On the flip side, I want the so-called "AAA" developers to stop making "action horror" in an attempt to hide their inability to actually scare gamers.

Also, online military FPS can get to fuck.

And almost every Ubisoft does. The cows have long since been milked dry.

Roujin

Developers listening to crying clueless fanboy fucks on forums.

Sasukekun

Roujin wrote:

Developers listening to crying clueless fanboy fucks on forums.

This.....so so this.

beano

I mean fuck the conventions of real life is all, dear Gunn. Something like kickstarter helps enable such, maybe. I'm not sure but I want to underline that it's all good and wasn't having a pop.

However, lets say I was; I'll get you a horse?

Y'know. #noxyforpresident

beano

Nintendo just need to get off hardware, be bought up for patents and split into studios where licenses have been appropriated. Same for them all.

I think we're close. Hardware is less 'special' going forward. The coming gen though might last 10years or more if it doesn't get emulated on PC. That'll be kicker. Multibooting hardware. Play whatever. Better, virtualise the shit out of everything and something like your TV acts as the client.

n0face

Games, I just don't seem to like them that much anymore.

g.man

afgavinstan wrote:

"Indie" Gaming Coverage - "So this is the new procedurally generated F2P robot pirate racer from The Guy That Brought Us Howlin' Doooooo 2. Get hyped!" Um... What? I don't know this guy, and I don't want to get hyped you mincing fuck. Show me his Edge 10s, eh?! SHOW ME!

Winner of Post of the Generation this. Tears of laughter

cheers Gav

g.man

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