The pit(figher)s - the worst games ever. - The Bear and Badger

monkey

adkm1979 wrote:

T2: Judgement Day

I had forgotten this game. Â Wasn't one of the levels a slidey tile puzzle of a T800 or something?

If it's similar to the Gameboy one then 'Level' 3 was a couple of screens that played like a poor man's Pipe Dreams. It was supposed to be John Connor reprogramming the T800.Â

This was a bad game mainly for its brevity. There's probably about 10 minutes worth of gaming in there, for the GB version anyway.Â

A couple of others I've not seen mentioned. Both pretty terrible but my hatred has been amplified by owning them when I was 7 or 8 and living in the middle of nowhere. So I played a lot but couldn't replace those games very frequently. The list then turns even more into petty grudge territory.Â

Fester's Quest - NES - Abysmal stuff. Cross a street full of aliens, go in a house, get a key, leave the house, cross the same street full of re-spawned aliens, get a key, leave the house, cross the street....
All while controlling a character that moved like a slug and with the worst collection of weaponry ever assembled.Â

And yes, it's Uncle Fester from the Addams Family fighting aliens.Â

World Soccer - Master System - most football games were poor pre-Sensible Soccer (why hasn't this been on anyone's Best eva list?) but this was the worst. It introduced the concept of live substitutions over which you had no control and appeared to have no limits on the amount it would make per game. Players would literally flee from the field at any point. Through on goal? Free in space on the wing? In goal with the ball flying towards you? No one was immune from the sudden whim of the CPU coach to sub them off and leg it instantly toward the bench.Â

AndÂ
LA Noire - worst gaming 'experience' this gen

Somehow I managed to break the game during the tutorial. I did race through the first bit where you have to walk round a highlighted area until you found something. Then some of the worst driving ever. I pressed a button with little thought when I was interviewing some women in a shop. She ended up getting angry. Then it went to the interrogation. If you get it wrong, the boss sends you back into the room until you pick the right option. I tried each option at least twice. Every time the interviewee got hacked off and the boss sent me back in. This was 30 minutes in.Â

Fuck going through again from the start. Fair enough that you have to play the game properly and if the game had been anything less than a total turd in the time I'd had with it, I may have been tempted to. It's as much of the game as I've played.Â

The Godfather - games of movies piss on their source material all the time. And there are worse games made from movie licenses. Alien 3 had one alien and no weapons. How do you make a game from it? Forget about the film and just make a game. This was weird though. It interlaced bits from the film with completely ridiculous bits of game.Â

So the scene where the Godfather is shot down and Fredo is so panicky he drops his gun, the game takes over at the end of that scene and Fredo becomes Tommy Vercetti from Vice City, leaning out of the window of a speeding car, shooting a tommy gun and yelling expletives at approaching enemies. Objectionable for trying to have its cake and eat it.Â

monkey

Oh and its already been mentioned but Spiderman 3 was rancid. Spiderman 2 is one of the best movie games ever. How did the same developer manage to break it so badly?

kollarn

monkey wrote:

And there are worse games made from movie licenses. Alien 3 had one alien and no weapons. How do you make a game from it? Forget about the film and just make a game.

I initially read this as you slagging off the Alien 3 game. I might need to get off this machine and out into the sunlight before my addled reading comprehension gets anyone hurt.

afgavinstan

Back to the Future part III on the MD was horrible.

Aaroncupboard

I vaguely remember being giving a god-awful wakeboarding game on the PS1. My total play time was about 10 secs.

In regards to worst games this gen, Chromehounds was terrible. As was a flying game very early on this generation, but I can't remember what is was called.

Mouldywarp

@JonB

I agree with what you're saying about context, but I still think that if anyone enjoyed the game back then they should still be able to enjoy it now. I can still play Space Invaders now and enjoy it, despite the fact that I have Ikaruga. It might be basic but it's still a good game.

I've played Goldeneye recently, like literally a few months ago. It takes about 1 minute to re-adjust to the plodding frame-rate and crappy graphics. After that time, it's much the same as it was 1997.

Perhaps I confused matters by adding the stuff about not thinking the game was that great in my original post. I didn't want it to seem like I wasÂ necessarilyÂ defending the game, but actually my opinions of the game's quality are irrelevant. I was just trying to say that good games don't suddenly become crapÂ becauseÂ something better comes along.

metagonzo

My housemate obsessively played the shit out of Chromehounds. Be careful; he's probably looking for you.

Edit: @Aaroncupboard of course.

retroking1981

Moot_Geeza wrote:

adkm1979 wrote:

retroking1981 wrote:

T2: Judgement Day

I had forgotten this game. Â Wasn't one of the levels a slidey tile puzzle of a T800 or something?

Possibly.Â It took us twenty minutes to get to level two, which is where we gave up.

This is the one:

Click the link at you own peril, once you've watched it! You can't unwatch it!

retroking1981

monkey wrote:

adkm1979 wrote:

T2: Judgement Day

I had forgotten this game. Wasn't one of the levels a slidey tile puzzle of a T800 or something?

If it's similar to the Gameboy one then 'Level' 3 was a couple of screens that played like a poor man's Pipe Dreams. It was supposed to be John Connor reprogramming the T800.

Fester's Quest - NES - Abysmal stuff.

This was indeed a piece of shit. Worst NES game I ever owned.

Your also spot on with LA Noire, for the first half hour or so I thought it was amazing, then the realisation sets in that no matter what 'choices' you make your just on a dull scripted road of endless B movie sub plots. Superb graphics but thats about it, I'd probably rather play Fester's Quest

Birdorf

Final Fantasy XIII is very good.

hylian_elf

Mouldywarp wrote:

I was just trying to say that good games don't suddenly become crapÂ becauseÂ something better comes along.

Over time, yes. Suddenly, no.

regmcfly

But Tetris.

hylian_elf

Wait, Tetris suddenly became shit? Wait, who you agreeing/disagreeing with here??

regmcfly

I'm saying it's never aged a day.

Tempy

Austerity innit, it's why Mario platformers tend to work so well: don't mess with the core.

adkm1979

No, he's highlighting that a solid game is a solid game forever, like Tetris. Â Some games that were great are no longer good, like Power Drift. Â Some games were shit, and were never going to get better with time, like Star Wars: Masters of TerÃ¤s KÃ¤si.

Edit: Â Sorry, far too slow.

regmcfly

adkm1979 wrote:

No, he's highlighting that a solid game is a solid game forever, like Tetris. Â Some games that were great are no longer good, like Power Drift. Â Some games were shit, and were never going to get better with time, like Star Wars: Masters of TerÃ¤s KÃ¤si. Edit: Â Sorry, far too slow.

This.

mk64

on another note, one of the oldest goldeneye world records was broken a few weeks ago.

adkm1979

Was it Furthest Distance Seen Through Fog?

Mouldywarp

No, I'm saying a good game is a good game. I have never played a game, liked it and then replayed it years later and disliked it. Perhaps it's because I skip fromÂ generationÂ to generation so nothing feels retro to me - I'm as likely to play a NES game next as I am a PS3 game. I'm not often bamboozled into thinking a shite game is good by flashy new technology.

adkm1979

Well, you're wrong. Â The side-scrolling adventures of old just don't cut it any more. Â They're not as involving as current games, don't deliver as involving an experience. Â Batman: The Movie on my Spectrum and then Atari were great then, but anyone releasing that now woud be laughed at.

Mouldywarp

But surely you could still get some enjoyment from it? I appreciate that things evolve and that we have "better" games now, but that doesn't make the old gamesÂ bad. It might make them "not as good as what we have now", but that's a very different thing. Say you were stuck in a log cabin snowed in by an avalanche. You're there for a week with nothing but Batman: The MovieÂ on the Spectrum. You'd play it and you'd be like "Actually, this ain't half bad". You don't play it now because you have better alternatives, not because it's a bad game.

Note: I have never played Batman: The Movie. I'm just assuming (at least from your perspective) that it's a good game because you once enjoyed it.

mk64

i still think double dragon is better than alot of new games.

http://youtu.be/q5xVofjXa9E (the GE 22 vid)

Billy

Brooks wrote:

Oh god, Time Commando. Tried that offa fond memories of LBA (same team, I think). They did not repeat that form.

What was LBA?Â Doesn't ring any bells for me.Â Glad I'm not the only one that endured (laughed at) some of Time Commando.

Brooks

Little Big Adventure, one of the better videogames ever made.

Mouldywarp

Ok, in seriousness, the worst game I've ever played is "MonkeyÂ Mischief" on the Wii. My well-meaningÂ girlfriendÂ bought it very cheap because it said "fun for all the family" on the back and she thought I could play it with our child (I couldn't). It's a mini-game compendium.

Seriously, it should have been illegal. An absolute disgrace. Cheap, lazy,Â cynicalÂ exploitation ofÂ innocentÂ people like my girlfriend who don't know any better. I could explain in detail the terribleness of it but I can some it up in one key flaw - it didn't have a soundtrack. At all. A bit of shit music for the intro and then that was it - no music, no sound effects. Nothing but the sound of your will to live burying itself as deep as possible in the empty void that had replaced all things good around you.

However, watching with bated breath as my brother tried, and failed, to fling a hippo further than me in deathly silence was one of my gaming highlights of the last 10 years. That probably says more about me (and my idiot brother) than it does about the game though.

dynamiteReady

regmcfly wrote:

I think people are mistaking WORST with 'games I have a grudge with'.

Yes.Â

Bayonetta?... Really?

From here on in, I think only video evidence will do...

Yes... That's right... The 'camera' really does switch once you make it out of midfield, and into the 'final third' of the pitch...

Facewon

There's been some crazy talk going on up in here. obviously part of the problem is that you forget the really shit games, and remember the games-with-some-expectation-that-disappoint more.

All the GE hate is ridiculous, for a start. it was in no way "bad at the time." And Quake can lick my salty nuts. (Not that I'm adding it to a worst game ever list.) What Jon said, innit.

Facewon

regmcfly wrote:

adkm1979 wrote:

No, he's highlighting that a solid game is a solid game forever, like Tetris. Â Some games that were great are no longer good, like Power Drift. Â Some games were shit, and were never going to get better with time, like Star Wars: Masters of TerÃ¤s KÃ¤si. Edit: Â Sorry, far too slow.

This.

Well, that, but it's also an uneven playing field, games that rely on the latest tech to look and play well are always going to age worse than tetris and it's ilk.

It's not as black and white as "well, if the gameplay was up to par the graphics wouldn't matter." Surely?

Escape

Mouldywarp wrote:

Regarding Goldeneye, I can't understand how a game can be "good back then" but shit now.

Frames per second.

My former love of 00 Aztec was no prep for a brief return a few years ago, when I could barely hit the first greeny on Cradle's opening bridge.

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