Intro
I’ve been critical of this game, but also defended it a fair amount. It’s not as bad as people seem to be saying, but it does have issues - indeed, it has some big ones. But when I finally saw the end and completed the epilogue, I can say it was a game that, overall, I had fun playing and that I am glad I had played. I couldn’t argue that it was amazing, or that it stands toe-to-toe with the original trilogy, but I can say that there is something there and that, at its best, the game manages to almost reach some of the peaks of the previous games.

Story and a Basic Summary
If Final Fantasy XV was a story of boys growing together and staying together, ME:A is about family - in both a literal and figurative sense. It’s about the twin Ryder siblings, of which you choose one, their father and mother. It’s about the families that were left behind by everyone when they made the trip to travel to a new galaxy. It’s about outcasts and exiles finding new homes and new familial bonds.

There’s another big theme: Adventure and Exploration. Colonialism, the obvious worry here, is touched on and, for the most part, handled well enough even if it gets hand waved away under the pretext of colonialism being the past and these adventurers here just wanting a nice new home to settle down on. But it does get talked about, and fears of colonial oppressors, changing demographics and erosion of culture are present and accounted for.

And that’s good, because the main story beats - an evil race of nasty aliens, named the Kett, being led by a monologuing meanie, called the Archon, is absolute first-rate guff.

Think about Saren - he was the bad guy, sure, but he was also right. His motivations were flawed, perhaps, but clear. The Reapers were coming and no-one else saw it, so he figured the only way to prevent the eradication of life was to bargain with them and hope they kept their word. He was manipulative and manipulated, conflicted and contradictory. He was a great villain and, alongside Sovereign represented a real threat.

Think about Harbinger. Think about The Illusive Man. Think about The Collectors. Think about the Reapers, in general. Mass Effect has had a more than reasonable amount of great antagonists and enemy armies. But they were never evil for evils sake. They had a purpose and a goal and it was opposed to yours, yet consistent. The Illusive Man didn’t swagger and monologue, he chastised you for your naivety, your assumption that you could succeed without making the hard choices.

Now forget all that, because you won’t get that from the Kett. The Archon basically spends the whole game getting thwarted by you and all he can do in reply is say “I’ve tired of your games now, I will kill you” before not killing you and repeating the same routine next time round. He’s supposed to seem powerful, he’s not. He’s supposed to be intimidating, he’s not. He’s all talk and no trousers and he’s boring.

At the end of the game you fight multiple waves of enemies and push buttons while he taunts you about how you are going to die and suffer and blah blah blah. It was such an anti-climax, but at least it was consistent with his previous characterisation - as an impotent, arrogant dullard.

So the primary antagonistic force is a bust, but a lot of the other stuff manages to do itself proud. Exploring planets is wonderful and, at these moments, the game looks gorgeous. Racing along endless sand dunes alongside the wreckage of a massive abandoned battleship? Check. Wandering through a humid jungle filled with alien plants and all manner of purple hues? Check. Seemingly barren ice caves filled with perilous drops and icicles everywhere? Check.

Of course, it’s not always good looking - the texture work on a lot of the ground and mountain regions is…functional. And the vaults that reside on each world all look the same! But it’s all about those views you get every so often, when you forget how good the game can look and just pan your camera ever so slightly and then gasp a little. It’s doesn’t always look great, but it can look amazing. And that exploration is, in many ways, delivering on the promise of what the MAKO first offered in ME1. And yet, it’s also a link to a game that has loomed large over this one…

Dragon Age: Inquisition, Writing, Gameplay, UI and Bugs
It’s impossible to talk about this game without talking about DA:I, but first we have to get on the same page. Yes, Mass Effect has had mining before. And yes, it has had a tiered loot system (especially in ME1) and yes, it has had planet exploration in vehicles. It has all had research and various other things that turn up in ME:A. But the implementation of these systems in this game does not owe to the previous Mass Effect entries, they are very similar indeed to those systems in Dragon Age: Inquisition.

Think about the War Table, and what you can do there. Set off of missions, obviously, but also send people off to collect crafting materials, currency etc. That reappears here, and is done in an almost identical way. After building colonies on planets you get AVP - Andromeda Viability Points, lol - which you can spend on bring people out of cryo-stasis and which grant you certain biffs - resource gathering, a wider range of items at vendors - many of which deliver on a set timer played out in real time. Sound familiar?

Map areas are large and open and filled with mining areas, monoliths, ancient ruins, small enemy bases, caves, a Vault, memory shards (collectables for an important side quest) and, on many planets, one large enemy HQ. So, progression on these planets becomes a series of set actions - collect shards, unlock monoliths to unlock vault, do vault, knock out enemy HQ, set colony, move on. It’s formulaic in the way DA:I was (with its shard collectables, small enemy encampments, outposts, rifts and large enemy strongholds to overcome), but it’s more enjoyable. The sheer amount of collectables has been significantly reigned in and so, while there is busywork to be done, there is a lot less and and doesn’t feel like a slog once you get your head around the fact that you don’t need to do it all.

Another very Dragon Age thing to inherit is the crafting system. To craft something you first need blueprints, which need to be researched. To research something you need research points which you get by scanning things out in the world. But, there are 3 different types of items - Milky Way, Angaran and Remnant - and the research points don’t pool into a single pot. So, if you want to research remnant tech you have to scan Remnant items. So, lets say you have armour set X that you want to research. You have to research Armour Set X Level 1, Level 2, Level 3 (and so on) individually, so you can chew through research points pretty easily. Once you’ve done that, though, (let’s say up to level 4) you can now craft level 4 X armour. So now you need to switch to the development menu. In the development menu you can make the things you have researched - using mining materials and mats you have to collect in the world. You can also add augments to the item you are crafting to add permanent bonuses to it. In order to add an augment you need to find it in the world, but you can’t find it unless you first research it. Once you’ve done that and made the item you can now wear it and, possibly, add secondary augments which can be switched out from the load out screen. These also need to be researched, then found.

So, to make an augmented item you must:
1. Scan objects in the world related to the field of tech you wish to produce to gain research points.
2. Research the item using research points, up the the level you can afford.
3. Research any augments you might want to use in the item using research points.
4. Find the augments.
5. Collect mining materials and other resources.
6. Set up the item craft and add any (pre-researched and discovered augments).
7. Craft it.
8. Add secondary augments.

You now have one item. There are 4 different pieces of clothing you can wear at one time - Head, Chest, Legs and Arms, plus up to 4 projectile weapons and one Melee weapon. Imagine doing that for each and every one of those.

Of course, you don’t need to craft these items, you can just buy them, but then you won’t have the same level of buff that you could have with an augmented crafted item. Incidentally, Dragon Age did things in a very similar way. Mass Effect, even in the first game, never had this much faff. It’s pure collectathon gameplay and it’s ripe.

These kinds of UI frustrations and, needless, complexities are endemic in this game. The check your email you have to go to your ship, The Tempest. But if you go to the Tempest, it automatically takes off, triggering a cutscene. And missions send you all over the place, between planets and systems, all of which have animations that play out repeatedly which you are forced to watch. It’s only 5-10 seconds at a time, punctuated by loading, but it adds up when the missions have SO MANY STEPS.

Let’s say I’m on a planet on a mission and I’m informed I have an email. I can’t check the email through my otherwise omnipotent AI implant so:

1. Return to Tempest
2. Tempest Automatically takes off without prompting (cutscene then loading)
3. Go to email and read it.
4. Go to Star Map and select to leave system to go the system where the mission is (slow animation) or Ireland on planet you were just on if the mission was there (another landing animation)
5. Select planet in system I want to go to (another animation of your ship travelling to this planet, then a second animation as the camera resets itself and swings back to a full view of the planet).
6. Select to land on planet.
7. Select load out and team members.
8. Land (animation)
9. Go to quest giver and talk to him or her.
10. If mission is on another planet (they often are) then repeat the above.

So many parts of this game are needlessly embellished and strung out. But, then again, ME2 streamlined from ME1 significantly, so perhaps all hope is not lost. It’s just frustrating as it makes me dread having to go anywhere, but often the only option on the place you are, once you’ve done what you came to do, is run through the sidequests. Some of them are great - really, up with some of the best in the series - but some of them are merely average and a number are just pointless.

DA:I also handed down its dialogue system - doing away with the Renegade and Paragon systems of ME games past. I’ve said elsewhere that while this gives the opportunity for nuance, the game rarely takes advantage of it. While you don’t need to be locked into playing a certain way anymore (in order to ensure you always have the best dialogue choices available) the writers dropped the ball.

In one mission I had a choice to release of exile someone accused of murder. I had discovered that he didn’t kill the guy, but that he did attempt to kill him, covered it up, mutinied and perjured himself. But the game offers you 2 choices: Lie and exile him, or release him as an innocent.

In another side-mission I was sent by a doctor to track down and steal the recipe of a dangerous drug doing the rounds - a drug he admitted he helped create, originally for medicinal purposes apparently. I find the outpost where it is, kill the guards and head in to find an Asari. She claims the doctor just wants it for himself so he can develop and sell it for profit and that I should leave the recipe with her. If I don’t she’ll surely be killed by her boss. She also said the doctor is a liar and shouldn’t be trusted. The game gives you two choices:

1. Leave the recipe
2. Take the recipe

Now, that’s bad enough since they’re both 2 shit choices (just like the mission above) that fail to understand or allow for nuance (like the mission above) but it got worse. I selected “Take the Recipe” not because I trusted the doctor, but because there was no way my Ryder would allow the sale of this drug to continue, but when I selected this option Ryder accused the Asari of lying and that the doctor was a trustworthy guy. Wait, what? Ryder then gives it back to the doctor, no questions asked, because he’s “never seen [the doctor] do anything except help people”. I just met the fucker! What the fuck is this shit?

Of course, that’s not really a dialogue issue - that’s a writing issue and, make no mistake, some of the writing here is the worst in the series. Lines are written in a way no human - or alien, for that matter - would ever say, and this is reflected in some terrible voicework. Lines are read awkwardly, the tone of some responses seem way off - sadness punctured by Ryder sounding cheerful when the dialogue prompt implied levity. I had to stop trying to assume what the dialogue prompts meant sometimes, because I got burned too often. A good example is spoiled below. It’s a biggish spoiler, I suppose, but it’s right at the beginning of the game so everyone will see it within the first hour or so as it’s part of the main setup.

Now, this is important - that’s not the general standard of writing in this game. Most of the writing is fine and some is very, very good. But those moments stick out and are almost, it seems, at the most inopportune moments. That’s when you get the massive tonal missteps, the goofy faces, the cringeworthy flirting and dialogue so unnatural that it has already spawned memes.

It’s just as bad on the technical side. Legs bend unnaturally, people rag doll upon resurrection in battle, multiple channels of dialogue play over each other, vehicle audio cuts out of a number of planets, characters turn insole in dialogue scenes, characters multiply and walk though each other in dialogue scenes! Ryder falls through scenery, Ryder gets trapped INSIDE scenery. NPCs drop out of thin air if you run into a room. The frame rate drops to between 10 and 20 if there’s fire in an open area. The framerate does to single digits if you used a charged plasma weapon like a bespoke augmented shotgun (which took me FUCKING AGES TO CRAFT, FFS!). Mission locations don’t update, set pieces don’t trigger.

Just today I took out a base and couldn’t access a panel without killing everyone. But where was the last guy? I eventually found him floating in midair, not moving. So I shoot him and, as his healthcare hit zero, a body rag dolled out from inside of him and lay dead in the air below him. So i shoot him again. The same happens. I keep going….eventually he finally falls out of the air and into the suspended pile of bodies below him (I took a screenshot, obviously). Next step triggered, mission can continue.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: This. Game. Is. A. Mess.

An annoying mess as well, because that AI companion I mentioned above, named SAM, NEVER SHUTS UP!

PATHFINDER, I HAVE DETECTED A DROP IN TEMPERATURE.
PATHFINDER, TEMPERATURE RETURNING TO NORMAL.
PATHFINDER, THIS AREA CAN BE MINED FOR RESOURCES, YOU CAN EXTRACT MINERALS VIA YOUR MINING INTERFACE.
PATHFINDER, I HAVE MARKED THE NAVPOINT ON YOUR MAP.
PATHFINDER, YOU HAVE NEW EMAIL.
PATHFINDER…
PATHFINDER…
PATHFINDER…

You know who SAM reminds me of? Navi. Fuck Navi, and fuck SAM. Which is another shame because, outside of the CONSTANT INTERRUPTIONS AND REMINDERS, it / he is actually a cool character and utterly key to the plot of the entire game. There’s a great central tension in the game, which builds upon the Geth-based fears of a rampant AI, resurfacing in an interesting way.

But hey, I’ve complained enough, lets talk about some good stuff. You know what’s good? The MAKO NOMAD. That’s right, driving and exploring is actually fun in this game. Really fun. And the worlds are worth exploring. The NOMAD is tough and can get pretty much anywhere. It can jump (a little) and boost and it can extract you back to The Tempest in just one button press if you’re done with an area. Bliss. Bizzarely, it doesn’t seem to be able to hurt enemies - boost into an enemy at 100 miles an hour and they’ll just keep shooting at you while you fly into the air. Lol.

Weirdness aside, you know what else is good…?

Loyalty Missions
I really, really like the Loyalty missions in this game. They’re long, multi-stage and highly involved. Many missions in this game require to you to do things in steps before becoming “ON HOLD” while you wait for the next part to trigger. And, as a result, the payoff to them feels earned and you actually get to know the characters. While nearly all involve going to a place and shooting a lot, that’s fine - that’s been the deal in most of these games, right? But they at least have some fun set pieces and add depth to characters who formerly seemed utterly 2-dimensional. That’s not to say that the loyalty missions solve the characterisation issues in this game, but they do go a way to soothing these issues. Did I like Liam by the end of his mission? No, but I appreciated him more. I liked Peebee before her mission and I liked her after - even though it just led to a scene which added extra analysis to her one character trait (pretty much everyone only gets one main character trait or motivation) - her itchy feet. The culmination of a romance with her basically brings closure to this one issue.

And so the characters aren’t as deep as Jack, or Wrex, or Garrus, or Ash, or Tali or Liara or any of the main crew (except Jacob, lol) but I still managed to end up liking or, at the least, appreciating most of them by the end. There were still a few I couldn’t give a fuck about - Savi and Gil mostly - but it did manage to build that family feeling and the culmination of their story arcs were, for the most part, touching and, as I said, felt earned. Especially, when it came to romance.

Romance
Apparently Cora is ugly. I know this to be true because Mass Effect has been infected with the SJW disease and all the women must be 100% free-range mingers. But, I actually think Cora is quite hot. I like her face and her eyes and yeah, she done be purdy. Cora was also an Asari Huntress and is struggling to deal with not being the Pathfinder. You will know this because she will tell you a million times. This is her character.

But her loyalty missions and her romance arc were really well done, and she went from being someone I liked to someone I really liked. It’s just a shame that the initial flirting in a lot of these relationships is so weird and awkward (not to mention inappropriate). But, once you get past that initial hurdle, everything seems to get better.

Peebee is also pretty. Not so much from the cutscenes, but I feel like they changed her character model a bit from the early reveals (after the backlash) because her in game model seems less grungy. And, unlike Cora, she’s open to a no strings romance (at least until later in the game) which also fits her character.

They both actually have nice character models (and I don’t mean “nice” as in attractive). I mean, their eyes, mouths and facial expressions seem far better than most of those that you see throughout the game. I was wondering if it was just me but the level of attention they get in the romance parts of the game seem to show that yes, actually, special care and attention was placed on them.

The main human teammates, Liam and Cora, look alright, while secondary characters, Gil and Suvi, look less so, and generic NPCs…nasty. There’s a really uneven level of quality in this game which is a shame, but it does mean that in the areas where attention has been lavished - loyalty and romance - that the game absolutely succeeded. Also, for those that are interested, in the sex scene I saw there was full nakedness, gratuitous arse shots, breasts and explicit thrusting. There was proper lip smooshing, body kissing and actual pleasure and lust registering in the faces. It was short, but deffo the best game shagging since The Witcher 3. Fully-clothed showers in ME3 this ain’t.

However, as has become a theme here, every time this game does something well, it then does something to fuck it up. Once this slow burning romance has become a big thing, it’s pretty much relegated to a couple of lines of dialogue here and there and then…that’s it. There’s no option to spend time together or do stuff…it just fizzles out. That’s actually a step back from Dragon Age: Inquisition, and it’s frustrating that, once you really get to know and like the characters (even outside of the romance arcs) that it ends and that you’re stuck on a loop.

The Second Half and Changing Opinions
So, half of the game is really about settling planets and, if you want, you can run though the motions of raising viability on the planets by doing missions, clearing vaults and taking out bases. And, for the most part, it’s worth doing and it’s not bad. It’s Dragon Age, rather than Mass Effect, but it still works and the lore of the world as well as the excellent combat, is good enough to keep it afloat.

The other half of the game, outside of the open-world Terraforming stuff, is actually a rather good Mass Effect-style story. Tonally, it feels closest to Mass Effect 1, and you get that whole roaming the galaxy vibe you get from the first game. And, while i’ve complained about the baddies being dull as dishwater (and they really are), that is somewhat compensated for the fact that another new race, the Angara, are great. Especially your teammate from that race, Jaal. He’s awesome. Not quite Garrus awesome, but awesome enough and i’d say that him, Peebee and Cora are good enough to go into the original trilogy. You meet the Angara relatively early on, but things get better once the early quests involving them are settled. They’re a well fleshed-out race with clear motivations and an interesting backstory. While the Kett are absolute tripe, the Angara are good enough to match the Salarians, Turians, Krogans, Geth and Quarians. Much better than the Kett (seriously, did I mention how shit the Kett are?) who are ugly, and fly ships that actually look like green dog shits, as well as carry weapons that looks like green dog shits. They’re just not nice to look at - and not in an intimidating or scary way - in a dull, crude and unappealing way. But, enough bitching, back to the story…

Alongside a tight and somewhat brief main quest line are a series of genuinely interesting side stories which are optional but help flesh out a lot of the lore behind the andromeda initiative, the Ryder family and the various groups that exist in this new world. It would be easy to miss some of it, as it’s not always easy to know which side missions will actually be interesting, but it’s worth the time and effort. It’s during these missions, when you’re investigating and travelling and learning that the game feels closest to Mass Effect 1.

There’s also some stuff that… (BIG SPOILERS)
Many of the twists aren’t hard to see, but some genuinely did come as a surprise and don’t feel cheap. And that’s all I wanted. All of which constituted to a second half of the game which was far stronger then the first, which seemed like an overly fiddly reskin of DA:I.

The End
It’s a shame then that the end is very, very bad. The run up to the end is great - though some of the areas can be a bit samey - but the final, final section is just…a long fight with lots of enemies. I already mentioned it, but it bears repeating, the big bad who is presented as an imperious and cruel enemy the whole game never actually comes across as anything other than…well, shit. He mocks you except it doesn’t work because he’s mocked you the whole game and none of his threats against you ever came to pass. And so when he threatens or intimidates you, or places someone you care about in danger, it all comes across a little bit like schoolboy bravado, a little bit my dad could beat up your dad. And, seeing as this is the enemy that will take you 50 hours to beat, it sticks out as yet another mistake in a game filled with them.

The credits roll, there’s an epilogue and then you realise that, wait a minute, many of the more interesting threads of the game never actually got completed. Ah, the game says, go out into the world and mop up the rest of the stuff, but all the truly interesting things we dangled in front of you…those will be in the inevitable sequel.