Scottish pishba - The Bear and Badger

AndCallMeCharlie

Few of us were discussing the finer details of Scottish football (i.e. it's pish but also ace as every team hates each other) so here's a shinny discussion.
This is inspired by my team (dons) FUCKING OWNING the banter baton, within less than two weeks we:
1) Had the [font=nta, Arial, sans-serif]SEVCO SCOTLAND LIMITED[/font] for the taking in a cup semi before being too scared and defending on the edge of our box, to make doubly sure we bottle it our captain gets himself sent off for a ludicrously unnecessary challenge just before extra time
2) Get beat 5-0 at Tyncastle
3) Get beat 1-0 off a team of amateurs and knocked out the other cup
4) Do fuck all for 48 hours and put out a ridiculous statement saying the manager is staying
5) Get beat 6-0 at Easter Road against a Hibs team without 4/5 of their best players and who are also in freewill
6) Sack the manager with clearly pre-written statement 15 mins after the game who then has to walk across the pitch as players are warming down (WTF?)

Sounds bad? Nah fuck that, let's get the club owner on national tv crying.

Please chaps - lots of swearing and NO WHATABOUTISM

monkey

They have football in Scotland?

Unlikely

We call it "soccerball".

afgavinstan

Oh, so this is a safe space for gloves off cinch beef between pals? Right on.

It's been immensely pleasing watching Aberdeen recently. I think those two late Arfield goals really broke them.

And for the section of their fan base that still sing about Durrant, get it right up every single fuckin one of yous. Immensely detestable club at times, so this is all just very much deserved. No doubt they'll stab us in the heart with a late winner against us soon enough because we're their cup final always, but for now I'll just cock my head back and laugh. Fuck em.

Thanks.

RedDave2

https://youtu.be/AFDWFTiKwss

AndCallMeCharlie

afgavinstan wrote:

Oh, so this is a safe space for gloves off cinch beef between pals? Right on. It's been immensely pleasing watching Aberdeen recently. I think those two late Arfield goals really broke them. And for the section of their fan base that still sing about Durrant, get it right up every single fuckin one of yous. Immensely detestable club at times, so this is all just very much deserved. No doubt they'll stab us in the heart with a late winner against us soon enough because we're their cup final always, but for now I'll just cock my head back and laugh. Fuck em. Thanks.

Nah we were dead long before that, Celtic game few days earlier was much worse.
As for Durrant - do the rangers fans sing "he's blue, he's white, he's fucking dynamite etc." against any other opposition?
And yes, games against the rangers are always special and it has nothing to do with Ian Durrant - goes back much further.

AndCallMeCharlie

@RedDave2 - an all time classic

hylian_elf

I need a Darkplace full rewatch.

DrewMerson

AndCallMeCharlie

DrewMerson wrote:

hylian_elf wrote:

I need a Darkplace full rewatch.

It's all on All4.

afgavinstan wrote:

And for the section of their fan base that still sing about Durrant, get it right up every single fuckin one of yous. Immensely detestable club at times, so this is all just very much deserved.

As someone who isn't hugely invested in Scottish football, but sees enough of the fanbase behaviour, I always smile when I hear anyone complaining about other teams' supporters, as though anyone is proportionately better or worse than anyone else. I have a bluenose colleague who swears blind (and seems to only be half-joking, if that) that Celtic fans are more likely to be paedophiles, and points to it as evidence if we get a new one, dismissing the fact that we've got more Rangers fans on our books (which I would simply put down to there being more Rangers fans than Celtic ones in this neck of the woods).

That’s fair, every club has a section who say the most vile shite - all glass houses. I have had arguments with fellow fans about racist shouts.

RamSteelwood

There was quite a lot of rivalry between teams in the old pub sunday league i used to play in too

afgavinstan

Nah Celtic fans are just serial ambulance chasers. Always cheated, never defeated etc etc.

The worst are the sanctimonious types who then also throw about hun and orange bastard with reckless abandon. I couldn't care less what I'm called but same, glass houses n that.

Minnesänger

I remember many years ago, back on the original Edge forum, that Ronaldinho laid into me as he thought i was taking the piss when i didn't know what Fitba meant. But I had genuinely never encountered the word in my life and was utterly clueless. That's my Scottish Football Story.

On a related note, is this also the thread for curious foreign types / southerners to ask about Fitba? If so, would anyone be willing to kinda explain what the deal is with the Scottish FA and Scottish football organisational management in general? From the outside it just seems to be weirdly dysfunctional and i'm not sure if i've gotten the wrong end of the stick or what (and yes, i know the Premier League and FA are not shining examples of Good Bodies).

afgavinstan

There's SFA and SPFL. Both ran by utter idiots. The fa decide to bring in VAR instead of actually training the refs to pro level, they're all semi-pro volunteers. Chaos (while funny and at the same time kinda depressing) ensues.

The SPFL went and got the same TV deal with no increase from Sky, who then only show the old firm, don't even fulfill their live match total obligations, and constantly make errors in graphics. Basic shit. Could've easily put a streaming thing together and sold that but nah, just accept the same shite. Idiots everywhere.

Minnesänger

Fuckin oof.

How does revenue split work for teams with that TV deal, then?

afgavinstan

Don't have specifics but you can gather the majority goes to the big Glasgow two.

But this is where we descend into eating ourselves, and the pettiness we Scots oh so excel at...
Rangers actually called for a NC vote on the SPFL and required a 11-1 majority for it to happen. But almost all the other clubs went "haha get it up rangers" and voted no. Then all that shit happened with the TV deal. Coulda woulda shoulda. Why look into the betterment of the game in our nation when you can say lol get it up the huns instead?

(that will probably be interpreted differently by other fans, we are what we are)

LivDiv

I remember going to Manchester the day after Man U vs Celtic and the place was fucking trashed.
FITBA

(would have been some point between 2006-08)

edit: was Celtic not Rangers oops.

AndCallMeCharlie

Also worth noting that the SFA are rabbid kafflicks/huns/Weegies depending on your loyalties.

monkey

LivDiv wrote:

edit: was Celtic not Rangers oops.

Same difference.

afgavinstan

Can't believe liv misarseholed me

Stepping away from the forum for a bit.

LivDiv

Im convinced it was Rangers but cant find a fixture in the window it would have been. It was while I was at Uni so a specific 3 year window.

Diluted Dante

Rangers fans destroyed the city at the UEFA Cup final in 2008.

LivDiv

That'll be it.
Gav come back!

davyK

Football in NI is colourful. I've heard Scottish football described as NI football with a crowd that turns up to watch.

The odd match gets coverage from local BBC. I've seen more people in my back garden.

AndCallMeCharlie

Diluted Dante wrote:

Rangers fans destroyed the city at the UEFA Cup final in 2008.

Yeah that's what sprung to my mind v. Zenit

Scout

I'm a Rangers fan living in Swansea. Quite like being away from the bile of the Glasgow football bubble. I've been to a few Swansea games and fuck me the difference compared to Scotland is night and day. One one hand it's lovely. Family atmosphere and no-one in the crowd losing their minds over a football score. One of the Swansea matches I was at they lost a goal in injury time to lose the match. The general vibe was 'oh that's a bit rubbish' and they all went home. I've been in Ibrox in a similair situation to see guys booting chairs and falling over each other shouting the worst kind of poisonous hate under the sun. Brutal. At the same time the Swansea matches have felt pretty flat and passionless compared to anything in Glasgow.

It's nice seeing lots of cars and flat windows etc with Swansea stickers and flags. You won't see a single car in Glasgow (maybe even Scotland) with a Rangers or Celtic sticker. That hatred is deep rooted.

afgavinstan

Great patter here:

https://twitter.com/PBSC1903/status/1620426714403971073?t=Bt5gHU7G9dEll5yHXQjWdA&s=19

"it defies logic and Christianity" my new twitter bio

afgavinstan

No, it wasn't me who sent it.

AndCallMeCharlie

afgavinstan wrote:

Great patter here: https://twitter.com/PBSC1903/status/1620426714403971073?t=Bt5gHU7G9dEll5yHXQjWdA&s=19 "it defies logic and Christianity" my new twitter bio

Didn’t realize 2nd class stamps were still a thing!
I would keep the ice cream and jelly on hold, we have serious backers who don’t do walking away

Pseudoscot

Diluted Dante wrote:

Rangers fans destroyed the city at the UEFA Cup final in 2008.

and prompted this masterpiece:

afgavinstan

Right then, is it time for a crudely edited w/watermark hype vid for a new signing? I think so!

Can't believe we've spent money on a actual midfielder. Hope he balls out.

Howdy, Stranger!

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