Started as cleric because Garl Vinland. I couldn't light the first bonfire. Ok, I thought, maybe you have to activate them somehow this time. Going completely dark meant I knew nothing of how the game is structured. Reached what looked like a boss arena but no boss appeared. Maybe it shows up later or something, NG+ perhaps, plenty of bloodstains around anyway, could even be a PvP hotspot.
Then I see the invisible geometry and floating trees in the next area, so I reload the game and it seems fine. I can't go back through the door to the arena area as it's closed so I guess you have to do that lizard at your starting level, that's cool.
Onwards to firelink, level up, look longingly at the halberd, fight katana man, fight katana man, blast katana man off cliff with Force. Explore. Can't fast travel yet so I explore some more. Run around for a bit gathering a few souls. Ok where the actual fuck do you go.
Maybe it's another glitch. Reload: no change. Start another build: ok there was a boss wtf. Still no clue where to go afterwards. Tried playing offline, in smouldering and non-smouldering form, killing everything, exhausting all NPC dialogue, tried a third build on my Japanese account, skirting the perimeter of the entire area in search of a path. Still nothing and still no travelling from the firelink bonfire.
Message Curtis, he has no idea. I buy halberd with my amassed souls, small comfort but tbf it is pretty cool.
"Any luck" he says, just as the pieces fall together in my brain. Missing geo, missing bosses, no access to other areas and, come to think of it, the game did download at a remarkable speed. Still sitting here with 15 minutes remaining on the download, may as well kill those dreglings again...

Deacons of the Deep.

The church in High Wall with the old lady in. I know there's a ladder and a secret door behind her, but you can do something else in there but I'm not sure why yet!!! That's all I'm saying!!!