Nice, good food there and it's a lovely place. If she has any issues, lemme know - it can be a difficult country at times and she's gonna have to put up with a lot of shit, but it's worth it.

Is highly strung now a euphemism for massively racist?

Is a bit uncompromising now a euphemism for massively racist?

Outlaw wrote:

What kind of things? She's quite...highly strung, I don't know if she's a good mix with foreign cultures!

In the kindest way possible, being highly strung is not gonna help in China, especially for a woman. Let me out it this way...

What does your friend look like? Is she fat? If she is fat, why is she so fat? Why doesn't she exercise? Is she thin? Is her skin pale or dark? Is she tall or short? Is she married? If she isn't married, when will she get married? (The absence of partner wont matter to this last question). What kind of boys does she like? Would she ever date a Chinese boy? (If the answer is no, which it usually is with foreign women in China, tbh, there will be a follow up from the students saying something like "of course, Chinese boys are too poor" ignoring the fact that it is more to do with wives generally being expected to intentionally be less clever, less successful and earn less money that their husbands so that their husband doesn't lose face, as well as the general trend for the husband to disregard his wife's opinions if his mother disagrees). Is she interested in dating me? (That last question will be asked by slimy douchebags with a bit of money in their 40s looking for another trophy on the side - one of my old students used to always refer to himself as an MBA with the female foreign teachers- Married But Available.) When will she have children? (Once again, when). If she says she is not interested in Children: But aren't you a woman? Won't you be lonely? Who will look after you when you grow old? Won't your parents be disappointed in you?

She'll get these questions and ones similar every week. There's an undercurrent of sexism and racism that runs through this society. There's no malice in it - it's just there and most people don't even recognize it - but it is prevalent. She has to be able to take it on the chin, really. It's getting better and the younger students are really switched on and aware of it, but it's still a habit for now.

Her physical appearance will be scrutinized in intense detail, she will be prodded and poked, touched without consent and photographed constantly. People will point and look, especially if she has some physical defining characteristic, like fatness or prettiest or being tall. Unfortunately, it's far harder for western women to get along in China than western men. It sucks, but it's true - thankfully, it's not as bad as it used to be.

And that's not even getting in to the work culture.

She has to be able to take this stuff on the chin. She's gotta find some friends who she can vent with, have a nice social life, a cool little apartment and that's where she keeps her issues. There's just no concept of personal space or privacy and so she will feel like she is being intruded upon. If she doesn't, she's gone have a bad time and she won't last long.

Edit:

Oh, and tell her not to go to the cinema. People talking all the way through the movie, and not one or two people. People using their phones, answering their phones, I've even had people take pictures of the fucking cinema screen during key scenes! I avoid watching movies in the cinema here like the fucking plague. If I really wanna see a movie I'll go to a less popular area on a Tuesday morning, or something, and be ready to jump on anyone doing anything considered poor manners in a cinema.

Haha. Despite all that, I genuinely love it here and I think the people are great. I've just been here long enough to know what I'm in for. I always worry for the ones who are fresh off the boat - a lot of them don't make 12 months.

... yes?

Stroop wafel lovingly softened on one side over a mug of coffee for a few minutes.

FUCKING GLORIOUS.

mmm robot stir fry

these later

Does anyone know of any good restaurant recommendations for Leeds?

Also, picked up some more chillis and another bottle of sauce on the way home. 

Only thing missing is my Blair's Ultra Death, which is on my desk at work in case I make the mistake of buying canteen food.

adored wrote:

Only thing missing is my Blair's Ultra Death

I'm not surprised, how would you fit a disastrous Middle-East military incursion into the picture?

Big up the Cool Chile co. Great selections man.

If we're doing northern recommendations can somebody give me a shout for a good lunch around skipton for tomorrow?

When I get home I'm gonna eat a bowl of spaghetti the size of a small child.