6. Day Repeat Day
Link: https://store.steampowered.com/app/1532520/Day_Repeat_Day/

Have you ever wanted to play a Papers, Please / Emily is Away style interactive novel about life, love and the soul crushing nature of capitalism and labour while working for a company such as Amazon wrapped up in Match-3 gameplay? That's a rhetorical question, btw, I know that's what we've all wanted. 



Go to work and pick up your packing and distribution task list for the day. Send text messages between tasks to your boss, old flame, dead beat brother, the CEO...? Make choices about how to reply. Watch the days that you work there increase. Is this all there is? Do you ever feel like you could have aimed for more?

This game is...a lot. It's tone starts similar to Emily is Away but it quickly decides to lean into a pervasive sense of nihilism. The world is fucked, there is no joy, there is only work. The music, which starts electronic, chill and low key slowly becomes more strung out, distorted and unsettling. The game itself also becomes harder and harder to play. It's not a long game, but I would recommend not one-sessioning it, as i felt it overstaying it's welcome somewhat until the point I took a break and came back to it later. 



It doesn't pull punches and the anxiety around healthcare, money, children, alcoholism, grief, the ethics of working for a despicable company, the dawn of AI replacing workers...it's all there. It's a relentless amount of content for a game that, on the surface, seems so laid back and so slight. And there's secrets, oh lord there's secrets. Branching paths too, though I doubt i'll want to sit through it again to find all there is. Once was enough, and I feel drained having sat through it.



It's a great bit of work. Far from perfect, maybe a little too on the nose at times. Thematically muddled for sure. Maybe overly cynical. Certainly not traditionally enjoyable. But, it took me 4.5 hours to complete and it's also on sale right now for less than 4 quid. It's also on the Apple App Store (not sure about android) and would be perfectly suited to playing on your phone. [7]

Emily is Away is the GoaT of that particular genre still.

£3?! Isn’t that like twice the price of your normal purchases?! Moot be splurging now.

I have not played it hard of Flat Heroes I don't think, so the opening post from moot is, as ever, fake news.

Classic Moot / Muzzy.

There's no way the search function is going to help me with Flat or Heroes.

I tried 'flat' and it only went back as far as early January.

I knew elf was my favourite for a reason.

Looks like I'm talking out my arse and Muzzy didn't play it though, nvm.

12: Panzer Dragoon Remake (Switch) 6/10

This is my first time with PD.  I really like the setting, it seems like an original take on your usual fantasy/fantasy stuff.  Kinda middle eastern with laser guns, synthesisers and also dragons.  It reminded me of Rez, a game I'm not really big on.  Don't like the painting multiple targets with your crosshair then unleashing firing method much, prefer the old school hammering the fire button.  

I hated the first level, this is because I didn't know you could turn around!  It really opened up after that though and I ended up mostly having a good time for the brief duration of the game.  Mostly just sight seeing.

I don't really have much of an urge to play it again right now, but might well in a year or two. 

It is let down by running pretty choppily on Switch which is a shame.

30. Earthworm Jim (SNES, 2hrs+) & 31. Earthworm Jim (MD, 70 mins)

Disclaimer: I was big into this game when I rented it at least twice in the latter days of the early 90s. I managed to finish it back then but Christ knows how.  For reference, in 1994 this would've been a Moot 93%.

My appropriately named Virgin Games list, as it would have looked in 1993/4:

1. Aladdin
2. Cool Spot
3. The Lion King
4. Mick & Mack Global Gladiators
5. The Jungle Book (a stinker imo)

Only one of those is still good, so it's not like I'm about to be overly mean on DP's first Shiny effort (which would now sit at no.2, FTR).

I mentioned in the retro thread recently that Gargoyles, which I attempted to play on MD, 'felt a bit like [Earthworm Jim] minus the shooting', after having described it as clunky.  A couple of badgers weren't avvin' it and I got my legs taken out by Nasty Nick & Chopper Byrne.  After reading a recent Retro Gamer article I thought I'd double check the validity of my hot take.  

And after playing two stages of the SNES version it was pretty obvious I was right.  I defy anyone to play through What the Heck? without asking themselves that very question.  VAR decision is 'clunky', wrongfams.  From the opening screens it feels like a poor GBA port - you know the ones that were fundamentally solid but the screen was cropped and too close to the action (like Idunno, the Ecco port).  Retroking confirmed that this is exactly what happened with many MD to SNES ports but I don't remember this being a known or widely acknowledged thing at the time - I certainly don't remember it being touched on at all in the gaming press (or playgrounds) #backintheday.  Maybe that's because I only read the Sega mags, but I would've thought that would've been the most likely place to see it.  Anyway (to quote Richard Leadbetter's younger self), I digress.  The offshoot of this is that the clunk is exacerbated on the SNES, resulting in required leaps of faith, or enemies more or less hitting you before they're even on screen.  Without save states it would have been unbearable.

It's one of those games where you have a large pool of health, with various health pick-ups scattered throughout the stages.  Looking back on the likes of Cool Spot, Mickey Mania etc - games I enjoyed to varying degrees as a kid - this cyclical chip away/replenish health system was indicative of poorly designed gameplay.  You will take damage, but it's fine because you can recoup some here and here. AKA 'it's not tight enough to be played properly so let the player take more hits'.  This isn't always the case (Gunstar Heroes for example), but I'm having it as a rule of thumb for 16-bit platformers.  With modern sensibilities a giant highlighter pen flags up numerous deficiencies in EWJ's basics within a few stages, whereas something that might have felt dated at the time (let's say Wardner) almost improves with hindsight thanks to the precision play.  If Super Mario World is a sped up Stephen Hendry 147 break accompanied by the William Tell Overture then Earth Worm Jim is Nick poking balls with the fat end of Juanita (four Effes in) on three different tables at once to the Ready, Steady, Cook theme.

Don't get me wrong, this is An Important 16-bit Game.  The characters, sights, sounds and quirky inventiveness are absolutely wonderful.  There are numerous iconic moments and laudable one-shot diversions and it's vastly superior to a huge number of platformers from the era.  (Slug for a) BUT, it has not aged well.  For Nick: Remember the bit in Prince of Thieves when Marian's hand maiden pretends to be Marian on a balcony and Robin, who hasn't seen her for ages, does a porkie pie when she steps into the light and says 'time has...........been kind'?  That's you & Jim m8.  You know it's true.

The Megadrive version has similar design deficiencies but feels vastly superior thanks to the intended aspect ratio.  It also has an extra stage, but it's one of the weaker efforts on offer.  Anyone who plans to revisit should definitely go Sega with this one, I almost enjoyed it.  

SNES [4]
Megadrive [6]

So I stand by the thought I initially meant to run up the flagpole - release a game that plays precisely like this in 2022 and you'd struggle to get out of the 30s on Metacritic, based on the three sources willing to review it.

It’s really bad.

Moots absolutely right about the health pick-up and damage issue. It’s a state. A cover-up for slipshod gameplay. There’s one boss (around level 2 or 3) that you shoot at, he drops health, you can’t avoid getting hit, he has no health bar and no visual indication that you’re hurting him by shooting. So you just stand there shooting him for what seems like forever, getting hit, getting replenished, just shooting, wondering if you’re even doing it right. Then he dies. Great fun.

There's no damage runs on YouTube, lads.

There's a video of someone completing Punch-Out by throwing Maltesers at the buttons. Welcome to Youtube.

Doug Tenapel remains shit