Mario's nose is the same size as that guys entire head!

If suit-guy's a regular human then wtf is this Mario creature we've been playing all these years?

D/E - mildly interested if hacked, else not.

Speedhaak wrote:

Clearly the old guard are WAY out of touch with what gamers users want.

It's the art of tablet without tablet.

Moot_Geeza wrote:

I won't bother with the pro controller because I'll mostly be playing this on the handheld unit plugged into an AC socket behind my armchair with headphones on.

Unless its analogues are as horrible as they look, and you end up using it as a regular console with a Pro.

Dark Soldier wrote:

set play appointments

Diluted Dante wrote:

Wireless headset like PS3.

Just wow. This chat app requires a smartphone (I thought it was a Switch app), and that very device is going to show up the Switch's utter lack of functionality. It's like buying a Lotus to tow a Lada.

Smang wrote:

seems pre-orders are almost sold out already. oh Nintendo...

I'm really hoping that most of those are would-be scalpers that are about to get their asses cooked.

darkglobe wrote:

for kids a tablet is cool but they care more about Youtube and Netflix and streaming and letsplays, and this as a tablet looks like it may not deliver great versions of those compared to the iPads/Tablets they already have.

It doesn't have apps. The cheapest 10.1" tablets are £50, too, and as little as £25 for a 7 or 8. Amazon are fully aware that most Fire Stick purchases are for Kodi, but they're happy to feign ignorance. Nintendo should've looked at that as a proven case of aftermarket-app desirability.

mistercrayon wrote:

Also there's still E3 and everyone will go bananas when they announce science gun man 1

This is a really old argument that waters my wings a bit. Just because Nintendo have made some lovely games, it doesn't make them a lovely company (I've always compared them to Disney). And so I don't think it's a good idea to cut them that much slack for doing what they do, primarily because they haven't moved anything forwards for generations. Mario 64 is still the best 3D platformer in my eyes.

When it comes to what their games could be, they're well off the pace. Look at Ueda's storytelling versus anything in a modern Nintendo adventure; night and day. Mario and Zelda games could be so much better, but as best-in-class examples they're let off the hook for not being anywhere close to their now-attainable peaks. Zelda games have been overtaken in most ways, too, calling upon nostalgia to bear the increasing strain. If the Switch forces Nintendo into giving up hardware, I look forward to next-gen versions of their games, where they'll jump two generations in getting there. (The Switch should've launced when the U did; the U when the Wii did; the Wii when the GameCube did...)

Christ, I apologise for the length of the post this is turning into, but I might as well explain why TimeSplitters II was my personal butterfly effect that turned me against Nintendo. It starts before then with the Ultra 64, which I was so hyped for. But then the PlayStation arrived as I was only just into my teens, and the N64 became my second choice by its launch.

I adored Blast Corps and multiplayer GoldenEye, but my view on Ocarina of Time's well-known in these parts. I paid £50 for mine at Christmas '98, and the disappointment hit almost as soon as I climbed down from Link's treehouse. The first thing I noticed was the fog - a clear hardware concession to the attempted realisation of a stunning game; right idea, but needed a PC to render it. Then the autojump, and how I hated the autojump. It was empty of both inputs and visual spirit - a by-the-numbers retread of A Link to the Past in a sub-SM64 engine (having played Mario 64 first, I'd expected the controls to be ported across).

I gave up in the Deku Tree, leaving Link to its brown-creeping drabness and scant, offensively easy enemies. I played through it to completion seven years later, but out of a sense of duty more than anything. I enjoyed Gerudo's Valley for its music and bridge-jump, but that was about it.

So I wasn't keen on the idea of a GameCube, waiting instead until they were £130. I only had Monkey Ball, though (bought the GC for it due to its reviews), and decided that I wanted another game. I bought TimeSplitters II because it felt like a Nintendo game, coming from some of the GoldenEye dudes. This finally brings me to my butterfly: a mate had an Xbox copy, and his had multiplayer areas that were missing from mine. I paid more, too - £45 to his thirty-odd. My loyality to Nintendo was rewarded by a lesser experience, and I've never bought anything from them since. I know it's a bit silly, but that was my straw.

Plus, with stuff like Luigi's Mansion they were clearly serving up B-team output at that point. A cynical company in thrall to their own greed ahead of sustaining - and respecting - their erstwhile fans with further artistic, exciting, forward-pushing games.

Games of that type are now exceptionally rare, and when they do appear, they're usually isolated across discrete platforms. Nintendo used to be curators of the highest order, and that they still get away with selling overpriced games from the '80s and '90s speaks in full defence of that. Fuck 'em.

@regmcfly - press the leftmost two buttons at the same time and see if you catch the right stick.

JRPC wrote:

The real world Mario stuff made me feel...uncomfortable. Remember Sonic Adventure? Like, what exactly the fuck are we meant to make of this? I really did not care for that trailer, but I suppose it's pretty hard to imagine it not being a brilliant game. Bit of a depressing day all in all.

Am I right in thinking that will be a self contained level or maybe a hub world? The rest of the trailer looked brilliant awesome Mario.

SpaceGazelle wrote:

acemuzzy wrote:

I'm sure it'll be decent, unsure it'll be a masterpiece bit wouldn't bet against it.

It's got a whiff of Sunshine about it which is a bit unsettling.

Woah hey now Sunshine is a masterpiece

Aye, it looks shite in that pic but you'll be pelting about and bouncing off cars and stuff, not giving a fuck. Hopefully it's just a level and not a hub.

God, yes! At least it's in Frinkahedron. And how '90s are those clothes?! America are always a good few years behind on fashion.

It looks like a new PC mod for GTA IV.

This is utter madness. I take it Gerard Ratner is running Nintendo?

Stopharage wrote:

This is utter madness. I take it Gerard Ratner is running Nintendo?

@RedDave2 - Brother, can you spare two Joy-Cons?

[edit]

Oh, can you not play U games without the GamePad now? I've heard from several people that the GamePad's only required for the initial setup on more recent firmware. If you can buy an activated U for £30, a Pro for £13, and a power adaptor for £12 (and you already have an HDMI cable), that's £5 less than the Switch version of Breath of the Wild, and then maybe you can get a U copy for nowt with a hacked unit?

Escape wrote:

RedDave2 wrote:

Nah, I'd love to see them return to their glory days, .

We talking edge or nintendo here?

Edit: no, i dont know why the quotes did this either...

Syph79 wrote:

Getting some real Crazy Taxi vibes from this image. I think the reason folk are saying it looks like Sonic Adventure is that is looks like a Dreamcast game in its tones.

I'm saying Dreamcast because it looks like Sonic Adventure which took a cartoon character and dumped him in a realistic world.
If it was full Roger Rabbit fine, but it's not.

I am convinced that city is the hub as well. It is huge and in the trailer he jumps in a warp/rocket ship/house that appears to launch him to a level.

At first I was fine with it. Mario is a plumber from Brooklyn or whatever, if they made a Mario styled Brooklyn I would be gully on board.

This bad arch viz 90s trash "real" world.

Stick it in the OP Muzz:

Chat function is out for me if a smart phone is required.  Good.

Probably because they're hoping that the analogues won't be too heavily exposed in the absence of d-pads; because HD Remix was easy to update; and because it'll be an exclusive (or at least a timed one) due to its low demand elsewhere. They needed to complement it with a Smash to get any fightmen on board.

They've made chat so fiddly, Moot, you might as well set up Skype.

Syph79 wrote:

Why have they gone with an old style Street Fighter?

Because nostalgia.