127. Call of the Sea - Xbox One (6hrs)

Relentlessly tedious escape the room style walking sim.  I didn't click with the puzzle style at all - Virtue's Last Reward meets evil timeline Professor Layton - which means I'm probably going to be unreasonably harsh on it for the next couple of paragraphs, but I've got to tell my truth!  As a disclaimer of sorts though, it's not a bad game per se - some of the puzzles are intricate and I expect the processes required to coax out the solutions are rewarding if you like that sort of thing, so I'm effectively marking it down for doing what it's supposed to, but the whole thing had me pulling an outdated Do Not Want memeface.  Actually, because technology is a wonderful thing and people can do these things now, imagine the Robocop having a bad dream GIF, with Dawson's leery face covering Murphy's head.  I struggled with motivation throughout and rarely felt the rush of Eureka as I was too busy muttering things like "you're fucking kidding" and the oft-repeated "oh fuck off".  I think the FPS narrative games where you don't really solve puzzles and just plod through their stories are my preference, rather than having to rub your temples for 15 minutes while trying to open a temple door using *spoiler* a giant constellation matching floor machine with four parts, twenty buttons and a double page spread of scribbled notes.  There's a lot of trial and error here; puzzles that could be solved immediately that I assumed I had to return to with extra info being a particular irritant.  I'm not too proud to admit that I clearly prefer the 'if you forgot the locker code it's 1324' types.  As an aside, un-burning circles in fabric during chapter 2 is quite a skill.

So I didn't like the things I was required to do, but did I get on with the things I was shown and told?  Mmmm....not really.  I liked aspects of the story, but it's nothing to write home about (even though that's how it starts aha).  It's a too sweet love story at heart, with a fair amount of Lovecraftian nonsense thrown in, some Cities of Gold 'How Does it Work?' ancient technology with moving parts stuff, at least one meaningfully underlined passage in a tattered copy of Moby Dick, lots & lots of photographs, window dressing items to have a pipe at (a pipe!) and an inkpot's worth of journal entries.  I wasn't keen on the voicework either, as the lead was either saying things that could've done with a rewrite or delivering them in a slightly odd manner.  Her accent dictates that she pronounce Harry, her missing squeeze, as 'Hairy', which I enjoyed (tee-hee), but when she clearly says 'I believe Hairy visited this exposition' while looking at a photograph of a historical artefact, I was left wondering whether it was trying to be clever or if no-one had the heart to ask the actress to have another go at the word 'expedition'.  Or even exhibition.  Benefit of the doubt not given.  If you press A on two items in quick succession she likes to talk about both things simultaneously, which is a massive genre faux pas surely.  One more thing - at sprinting pace (which is just a more determined stride unfortunately) you can tripwire the next line of dialogue while you're halfway through the previous one.  For a game where so many of its puzzles require you to schlep from A to B and back again it's another oddity for sure.    

The underwater sections are dull too, although the story starts to kick into gear a little when you reach the later chapters.  It's probably time to wrap this up now.  I enjoyed the ending.  It looks nice when it's not struggling to keep up with what it's doing.  Did I mention the ending?  I think I would've appreciated this one a little more if I'd played it before Obra Dinn, but that blows this out the water within its first 20 minutes.  I found a user review I liked on the Metacritic summary page, so I'll close with that.  

Can you make more boring game than this?  I think you can't!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[4]

Astro Boy is number 8. Hopefully I can add Bloodborne at some point, and with Pokémon Shield I can probably say I've done 10 this year.

How do you post the gifs though? I tried to post one for Astro Boy yesterday but it didn't work.

Also, it's not the score that's a spoiler for you review, it's the gif that I scroll down to before reading your reviews. So this one was a big disappointment.

When a [6] is a [5]. Moot keep on Mooting. Love it.

My head is spinning. If this [6] is the best [5] ever, then how do you describe it as a [4]?! Best [4] there ever will be ever ever ever.

Watching you two argue is like watching Liverpool-City and hoping neither team gets any points

129. Mother Russia Bleeds - Switch (2hrs)

Criminally overlooked scrolling beat 'em up that could hold its own against SOR4 for a round or two.  I've played through it before in sp and co-op (on PS4), but fancied another bash after nabbing it for 89p.  I didn't realise it was made by Le Cartel though, who went on to make Heave-Ho! (AKA the best game of 2019).  It's more of an arcade cab style brawler than SOR4, so the moveset is on the simplistic side compared to Sega's glorious resurrection (think a notch or two up from Turtles in Time or Final Fight), but that absolutely works.  It's also the most violent videogame I've ever played, bar none.  If Streets of Rage 4 is Bond Vs Red on the train in From Russia With Love, Mother Russia Bleeds is the fire extinguisher scene in Irreversible, with extra hate.  Where you might be used to snicking people with knives or broken bottles in this sort of game, and watching them fall backwards as they might if they'd been kicked, MRB literally goes for the jugular with its instant kill approach.  As you attack opponents they visibly deteriorate until they're a pulpy, often headless mess.  Firearms are similarly brutal here (yep, it has desert eagles, rifles and shotguns too, and they all absolutely wreck), plus you can relentlessly go to town on any single opponent until you're interrupted. It's a bit much, but that's the nature of the beast.  Up to four player local co-op, you love to see it, plus the neon pixel look is strong and the glitch electronica tunes thump and thud along with the action.  Very good example of the genre.  [8]      



Yes, beardy does shit in his hand and chuck it there.

16. Demon’s Souls - [9] - 5hrs

The PS5 remake and I’ve got to about the same spot as I did when I gave up on PS3. Think I’m 4 bosses down (last was 4-1) and was enjoying it all massively. I think I have the patience to enjoy the challenge more this time. Even if I don’t make it to the end. I reckon I’d be much further along if it wasn’t for the next game. I’ll come back to this next year.

17. Death Stranding - [10] - 60+hrs

Well this came as a surprise. A purchase made simply because it was cheap and a few people in the thread made it sound great. But I have never enjoyed an MGS game. I’ve bounced off 4 of them and when I heard about more stealth in this I was prepared to do the same. But boy what a game.

Firstly, it’s beautiful. Not just technically, but artistically. This Icelandic landscapes, combined with the various weather patterns (have different types of rain ever been modelled as well), are breathtaking in places and there is a consistency and solidity to the visuals that is rare outside of an ND game. And then the cut scenes and character models are very well realised. On top of that it is technically very good. Yes some minor pop-in on the landscapes is present if you are moving quickly, but that is about it.

Secondly, sound. Discovered a new artist in the Icelandic Low Roar and the music fits perfectly with the cold barren landscapes you traverse. Initially, I wanted music of some kind available throughout the game, but developers obviously know better than myself, as it was the right call to use it sporadically. Letting the environmental sound effects do their thing is a much more involving soundtrack than any musical score.

So the game then. What makes it worth the time? For me it was initially the challenge of finding that route through the landscape, avoiding confrontation and getting the delivery done on time and in good condition. As I’ve developed through the game I realised either it made me, or I wanted to, bring some order to this chaotic world. I have spent most of my 60+ hours setting up infrastructure to smooth my traversal (and those of other porters) across the map. Case in point, I’ve probably spend 20 hours just gather enough resources to build as much road as possible. This then makes my future deliveries much much easier.

This approach can apply to combat. Outside the main story I tend to avoid combat as it is a waste of time unless you want to gather resources (materials and gear from MULE camps, and crystals from BTs). As both eventually respawn it is often worth simply avoiding the combat. However, even in combat the game gives you choices in how you approach it as you progress with lots of different gadgets and weapons to achieve your goal. Much like building roads if I get deliveries that involve going into MULE camps I tend to go in first and take em out before risking the time or gear fighting while doing the delivery at the same time. So like travel I like to prepare first then make the delivery as efficient as possible.

I could keep waffling about this game for hours (and I have in the thread) but it is easily a 10 for me and definitely in my GOAT list, quite high up. I know it will end at some point, but unlike a lot of games, I’m encouraged, not dissuaded, by Gurt’s own assessment of playing for 150+ hours.

Time to load up Sam. We’ve got deliveries to make.

16. Persona 5 Royal (PS4) - 26/12 - 142hrs
Well, it’s Persona, and it’s bloody great. Deep themes and highly thought provoking. Not as good as 4, which I thought had better characters, and the dungeons, while expanded and with set maps and light puzzles, were too long and at times tedious. But the social sim side is as good as ever, the battles are great, the soundtrack is brilliant, and the UI design is gorgeous. I’m gonna miss the Phantom Thieves, having grown so attached to them/the game over the course of 140 hours. Now to sell a kidney and hunt down P3P. 
[9]

133. Super Meat Boy Forever - Switch (6hrs so far)

This will be an ongoing thing, as I'm determined to at least attempt to unlock the majority of the dark world stages on my initial save file, but I'm ready to review.  It's a truly excellent auto runner.  Most of the layouts I encountered during my first playthrough were better than the best of most other runners I've played, and those 'chunks' are merely a few pieces of the jigsaw Tommy Refenes & co. have been slaving over for years.  Almost every new twist or gimmick works well (the only nope was the way the screen change for the otherwise excellent spider creature disregarded the precision of your jump inputs), but there's a genre ceiling for me, and no amount of blueprint brilliance can smash a great glass elevator through its roof, so to speak.  In a way it's harsh to knock a game for being as could as it could possibly be - Team Meat wanted to make the best auto runner ever, one assumes, and has succeeded - but the lingering taste of what could have been makes it hard to supress at least a whopping pang of disappointment.  Super Meat Boy is my favourite platformer of all time, and while this experience is just as pure, limiting the control of your character has sizeable repercussions in terms of all-timeyness.  The first question I'd probably ask Refenes is why, as in 'why did you eschew the perfection of the original in favour an endlessly repayable auto-scroller' (why, goddammit).  I expect I'd be initially satisfied with his answer, as he seems like a lovely chap, but after further contemplation I expect I'd be tempted to follow up with yeah...but why?  It seems perfect for streamers, as any combination of chunks should create a great experience, but I wonder if at some point over the past six years someone should've Hicks gif'd him with the 'ease down' bit from Aliens.  He was so preoccupied with whether he could, as they say, and may have gone a little overboard with the project.  This purportedly has 7200 levels, but surely that means checkpoints rather than full stages.  There seem to be around 40 chunks per world, meaning you'll see 200-ish on a light world playthrough.  If replayability is your bag you're in for a treat, it could feasibly last forever.  I've got a second save file on the go and haven't noticed any reused segments.  There's a hell of a lot of game here, and it's a bit overwhelming for the likes of me.

At its best it's masterfully designed, and none of the light world levels I played were ever less than very good.  The layouts are partly puzzle based as Meat Boy can change direction by bouncing from walls, and intricacy is the name of the game.  You'll learn what it expects of you, what you can do, and how to solve the patterns either on the fly or after a restart or two.  Please trust me when I say it frequently comes close to genre perfection, the main game is chef's kiss stuff (wonky first boss aside).  I love runners as they're a sort of zone out experience at their best - you know when you go a bit blind while playing something but can still play it?  Pinball blindness, I call it.  Just me?  Anyway, for me, the problems start to rear their head with the addition of the dark worlds here.  For an already tricky runner to get harder, it needs to become more precise.  So that means more memorisation and more absolute pinpoint requirements on the timings, which is when the fun starts to drain away.  The trickier stages were where the original game really came alive, so this is a shame to say the least.  There's also the misstep of the unlock requirements for the dark worlds to factor in, which struck me as pretty mean.  If you can hack it there's a ridiculous amount of content on offer even without the randomisation element (or indeed NG+, which is also a thing).  It still has bandages (pacifiers here) and warp zones too.  I'm almost certain I won't be able to handle it all though, if the first dark world was anything to go by, which makes the more malicious aspects of this one far less appealing than Super Meat Boy or The End is Nigh.     

In summary, I've barely scratched the surface by reaching the credits but what I have played might prove to be close to enough.  It's going in my top 5 for the year, because I can't stress how good this is when you're under its spell, but I expect it'll fade away a lot quicker than the original. [8] 

Aye it goes by itself, was defo set to be a mobile game for a while. You'd like it I reckon.

Once you get used to the bosses soaking up fire in Cuphead and it becomes all about the pure pattern learning it's legit.

I noticed you'd been putting the time in on Cluedo recently. Tilly wants Monopoly bit it's hard to tell whether videogame versions add rather than detract from the board game thing. Didn't realise they were playable online these days.

I think I'll add NBA Playgrounds 2 to my watch list, ta. I can't stand basketball but I have enjoyed a couple of BB games over the years. And let's face it, I'm never going to even make space on my SD card for NBA2K-whatever-it-was that I bought just because it was two quid.

Ha I'm not even sure I know the real rules any more.

One of my favourite Master System games that.

Still can't get over the disappointment that was Rastan Saga II on the Mega Drive.